The Subject Matter of Eight Unhealthy Emotions and Their Healthy Alternatives

To effectively use the ABC framework to facilitate your attempt to experience healthy negative emotions, you need to specify the Adversity you are reacting to and the unhealthy, self-defeating emotional-behavioral response you are exhibiting. People often struggle to correctly identify their feelings at C or the Adversity at A. For example, they may recognize they … Read more

Rational Remnants from My REBT Work Last Week

During my daily REBT sessions, I identify and dispute a person’s rigid, extreme, self-defeating attitudes. I then generate flexible and non-extreme attitudes and other self-helping thoughts, which I pass to the person to work on between sessions to adopt and implement. Before telehealth, I would write these attitudes on index cards and then give these … Read more

Identifying Critical Thoughts About Adversity Leads to Impactful, Effective Self-Help

In REBT, we use the ABC framework to understand our self-defeating emotional responses to Adversity. We also use it to help transform this unhealthy reaction into a healthy one, better enabling us to change what we can and live well with what is unchangeable. When we face unchangeable adversity, our healthy response enables us to find … Read more

Unconditional Other-Acceptance: What is it, and why practice it?

In Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), we encourage unconditional other-acceptance. It is a form of acceptance you apply to friends, family, colleagues, and everyone else you encounter. When you unconditionally accept others, you distinguish between the other individual and the parts of that individual you like, dislike, and evaluate as neutral. You restrict your judgment … Read more

Your Past Does Not Have to Determine Your Future

Albert Ellis, the originator of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy, argued that believing in the unchangeable influence of the past is invalid and self-defeating. Human behavior is highly unpredictable. Just because a person reacts in some circumstances one way does not necessarily predict they will respond in that same way under all conditions forever more. Yes, … Read more

Is My Reaction Healthy or Unhealthy? If Not, It is Time to Do Self-Therapy

When you are having a negative emotional or behavioral response to a negative state of affairs, stop and ask yourself:  Am I reacting to this negative state of affairs with a healthy or unhealthy emotional and behavioral response?  What are my many different goals in this situation, and is my response undermining my chances of obtaining them?  … Read more

How to Accept What You Cannot Change

In Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy, we encourage you to live your life to enjoy yourself. Albert Ellis, the originator of REBT, encouraged people to assume this was the only life they would likely have and to live it to maximize pleasure and minimize pain. He pointed out that humans are naturally inclined to have goals … Read more

April 17th, 2023

Let us be honest life is challenging and, at times, downright hard. Frustration, disappointment, loss, burdens, betrayal, incompetency, and complexity abound. In response, you experience emotions, feelings, and behavioral reactions. Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) is a philosophy for managing your responses to get more of what you want and less of what you don’t … Read more

Emotional Well-Being is a Never Ending Struggle

Whether we acknowledge it or not and cultivate and exploit the capability, humans can choose their emotions. You can think about your thinking, observe your internal emotional experiences, and work through your unhealthy negative feelings. However, you cannot achieve a never-ending state of emotional well-being. In Rational Emotional Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), we hold a … Read more