Ideas To Help You Function Well

REBT Ideas To Help You Function Effectively

  • Rating Your Behavior & Always Having Self-Acceptance: It is best to rate what I do in order to learn to improve my performance. I will always accept myself whether I do well or poorly.
  • Emotional Responsibility: People give me opportunities to get upset but I make myself upset over what they do or fail to do.
  • Uncertainty Tolerance: I dislike uncertainty but there are very few guarantees in life. Too bad! I can tolerate making decisions and taking action despite some degree of uncertainty. 
  • Pain vs. Suffering: Pain is inevitable in life but suffering is optional.
  • Realism & Tolerance: People and events will not always be the way I want them to be. People mostly do what  they want. Life will often be difficult. Too Bad!

Ideas REBT Encourages You to Relinquish

  • Musturbation: I must not make errors or have flaws – if I do, it’s terrible and unbearable!
  • Low Frustration & Low Discomfort Tolerance: People and events absolutely should be the way I want them to be; life must be easy and fair for a doll like me!
  • Deservingness: I deserve to be treated nicely, fairly, respectfully and when this does not occur I have no choice but to whine, pout and sulk.
  • Self-Esteem: My worth as a person can be measured and it is determined by my deeds, traits, accomplishments, physique, assets, possessions, and those of my children.
  • Approval Addiction: I must be loved, approved, and respected by practically every significant person in my life – if I’m not, it’s awful and unbearable.

References:

Ellis, A. (1985). Overcoming Resistance: Rational-Emotive Therapy with Difficult Clients. New York: Springer.

Ellis, A. (1962) Pocket Cards published by Albert Ellis Institute.

Jarrett, T. (2005). Warrior Resilience & Thriving. Slide set.