“Perfection is impossible. In the 1526 singles matches I played in my career, I won almost 80% of those matches. Now, I have a question for you. What percentage of points do you think I won in those matches? Only 54%. In other words, even top-ranked tennis players win barely more than half of the points they play. When you lose every second … Read more

I recently read in the Wall Street Journal about a new legion of “therapists” practicing “financial therapy.” These mental health practitioners aim to help individuals and couples with emotional and behavioral problems related to money management. Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy is well qualified to help people with these types of issues because many of these … Read more

Each year, on my birthday, June 9th, I celebrate with a shame-attacking exercise. Unconditional self-acceptance is cultivated and maintained by shame-attacking exercises that take you out of your comfort zone in interpersonal situations. They assist you in giving up an unhealthy need for approval from others and enable you to provide yourself with perhaps the greatest gift … Read more

Celebrating 200 Consecutive Zoom Demonstrations of REBT To celebrate the 200th consecutive Saturday Rational Emotive Behavioral Conversation Hour hosted by Dr. Walter J. Matweychuk on Zoom, a Q&A session was held with leading REBT author and psychologist Dr. Windy Dryden. During this hour, they answer audience questions about the pioneering form of cognitive behavioral therapy, … Read more

Healthy Attitude toward Adversity I wish there were a quick fix for my problems, but sadly, there are none. There are also no perfect solutions to any dilemma. Different solutions have different tradeoffs. When I am upset, I fail to appreciate my emotional choices. I can make myself miserable or have a healthy emotional response … Read more

My weekly therapy discussions with patients inspire some of my Intermittent Reinforcement emails. One particularly challenging problem parents request help with is when an adult child rejects them and refuses to have anything to do with them. Parents suffer tremendously when this occurs and often experience powerlessness, bitterness, anger, and hurt. Sadly, a parent cannot … Read more

People often acknowledge their friends and family’s self-defeating emotional and behavioral reactions, such as excessive worry, anger outbursts, or social withdrawal. As a friend or family member, you may be in a position to encourage these people to consider working on their self-defeating reactions and suggest how best to do it. Let me offer a … Read more

My emails aim to show how Rational-Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) can apply to different problems. In this piece, I will address how adult children with advanced education sometimes face interpersonal and emotional struggles with less well-educated parents. I will also show how they can feel healthy negative emotions like disappointment and sadness when they are … Read more

Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) is a tough-minded approach to emotional well-being, and this spirit of tough-mindedness attracts some people to it. In generic cognitive behavior therapy, the therapist guides the patients to test the validity of their worrisome thoughts, assessing the probability that adversity will occur. REBT, a distinct form of cognitive behavior therapy, … Read more

I feel about aging the way William Saroyan said he felt about death: Everybody has to do it, but I always believed an exception would be made in my case. – Martha Beck Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy is a system of ideas that broadly applies to life’s most significant challenges. Earlier this week, I read … Read more