Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy emphasizes choice. Humans are able to choose how they will think, feel, and behave in response to the challenges and opportunities they face. As the New Year approaches reflect on the following questions:
When you encounter problems, will you blame external conditions for your self-defeating emotions? Alternatively, will you see that you disturb yourself about the obstacles you encounter? Will you embrace the principal of emotional responsibility?
Will you choose to hold sensible preferences? Alternatively, will you rigidly hold absolute demands about how things “should” be?
Will you choose to accept yourself unconditionally even when you misbehave, error, and fail to make your best effort? Alternatively, will you choose to rate your choices, decisions, and performances while accepting yourself as a fallible human?
Will you choose to whine and complain or will you choose frustration tolerance and then make a focused effort to change what can be changed?
Will you demand that life be easy? Alternatively, will you accept life as it is and attempt to make the best of it?
Will you demand that others change so that you are comfortable? Alternatively, will you first try to change yourself and take control of your self-defeating emotions before attempting to persuade others to change their behavior?
Will you pursue what you really want in life and experiment if you are not sure or will you sit back and complain life is not fulfilling?
Will you choose to engage in a rational degree of regular exercise? Alternatively, will you neglect your body?
Will you do what is best in the long run or will you do primarily what is best in the short run jeopardizing your long-term well-being?
Will you seek external approval to a self-defeating degree? Alternatively, will you unconditionally accept yourself even when others disapprove of you?
Will you accept uncertainty? Alternatively, will you demand certainty before making decisions?
Will choose to be realistic or idealistic?
Will you choose to act or procrastinate?
Will you choose self-direction? Alternatively, will you follow others to your own detriment?
Will you live life to prove yourself or to enjoy yourself?
Will you work hard to achieve your dreams or sit back and complain you are not sufficiently talented?
Will you take other people too seriously and disturb yourself about what they say and do?
The choices you make in 2014 will determine how much pleasure and needless suffering you experience in response to the opportunities and challenges you face. Choose rationally!