It is important that I remind you how hard it is to change. People sometimes get down because they are finding it difficult to change and they think REBT is failing them. REBT is not failing you. This is true because nature has not made change an easy accomplishment. Change is new learning and the human condition is to be a slow learner. It would be lovely if we could change quickly, easily and thoroughly but sadly that does not happen down here on earth. We often look at others and think they are fast and effortless learners and changers. We are deluding ourselves. The most accomplished athletes, musicians, writers, and professionals from all disciplines have to work their fingers to the bone to acquire their skills and achieve their accomplishments. Don’t get down if you are struggling to change. Just see that it is hard for ALL of us. However, some of us stay with it day in and day out. We have grit for change. With effort over time we evolve and learn. Accomplishing personal change does not turn us into a great person but with blood, sweat, and tears we just may accomplish great things and thereby achieve a great deal of pleasure in the end.
Rational bottom-line: Change is uncomfortable and slow, but not unbearable. Implementing personal change and learning this skill is worth it and I am worth doing it for. Stay the course.
Note: I am a clinical psychologist with 27 years of experience using REBT and cognitive behavior therapy. I practice psychotherapy and train doctoral students in the practice of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy and Cognitive Behavior Therapy at the University of Pennsylvania’s Penn Behavioral Health Center located within the department of psychiatry of the Perelman School of Medicine. I am an adjunct faculty member of New York University’s Steinhardt School in the department of Applied Psychology, and author of the soon to be released Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy: A Newcomer’s Guide. I have a private practice in Philadelphia. I am available for psychotherapy, coaching, and professional training and consultation in person or by Skype. Feel free to contact me or join my Intermittent Reinforcement email list and get started learning Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy today.