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- You never have to get what you want, regardless of how badly you want it. You do not live in a utopian world where you can always have what you want.
- Other people will often not cooperate with you. They do not have to do so even when it would be better if they did.
- Life is often unfair. Accepting this and doing the best you can in the face of unfairness will help you to get more of what you want and less of what you do not want.
- Learn to take calculated risks and to take charge of your life. No one cares more about your well-being than you do.
- There are things you can change and things you cannot. When you cannot change external circumstances, you can work on changing your attitude toward those unfavorable circumstances. This option will enable you to experience a healthy emotional reaction to the unchangeable.
- Negative emotions in life are inevitable. They signal that something is going against your wishes. Healthy negative emotions motivate you to change what you can change. Healthy negative feelings of concern, disappointment, displeasure, and sadness frequently apply in our day-to-day lives. They are motivational and useful in many situations.
- Learning to tolerate difficult-to-bear feelings and external situations often enable you to persist in working at your goals and ultimately achieve your most prized pursuits.
- Comprehending why it is invalid to rate yourself when you do poorly or possess undesirable characteristics is challenging for most people to understand. You can come to understand this. Disciplining your mind not to rate yourself but only to rate your parts and performances is challenging. Cultivating this discipline pays significant dividends.
- Cultivating responsibility for how you react emotionally and behaviorally to other people and adversity enables you to function at your highest level. Blaming others and circumstances for your self-defeating emotional upset is tempting but quite handicapping.
- It is understandable to want love and approval from significant others. It is untrue that you need that love and approval in an absolute sense. When you get rejected, there are consequences. Learn to tolerate those consequences with healthy negative emotions.
- When you are frustrated by a problem, remember to tell yourself, “I don’t see how to solve this problem yet.”
- Cultivating the ability to accept what you cannot change or achieve, regardless of how personally meaningful the matter, will serve you well.
