Example Problem: You are an adult but your older sister treats you like a child. ABC Analysis of This Problem Your Goal: To be treated like an adult with respect. To be treated by your older sister as an equal. (A) Adversity: You perceive your old sister to be treating you like a child when … Read more
If you have a personal goal Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) can help you achieve it. REBT is a broadly applicable philosophy of life and a broadly applicable psychotherapy. Whether you are looking to find love, overcome an addiction, achieve in your career, raise emotionally well-adjusted children or better manage your self-defeating emotions REBT can … Read more
You May Get It If You Persist at It 5/26/2015 If you have a personal goal Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) can help you achieve it. REBT is a broadly applicable philosophy of life and a broadly applicable psychotherapy. Whether you are looking to find love, overcome an addiction, achieve […]
My mentor and fellow REBT psychologist, Dr. Windy Dryden, has written a superb book entitled How to Come out of Your Comfort Zone. He argues that we have two strong instincts and those are to either try to avoid discomfort or maintain comfort. He points out that these instincts are not self-defeating as long as … Read more
REBT starts with the premise that our emotional reactions fall into two major groups – the healthy group and the unhealthy group. The healthy group signals we do not like something and helps us change what we can change. These negative feelings are helpful and motivating. The unhealthy group signals we do not like … Read more
The key to coping well with life’s adversities is to question your rigid and extreme beliefs. Rigidity and extreme beliefs lead to unhealthy negative emotions. The unhealthy negative emotions and their healthy counterparts are listed below: 1. anxiety (vs. healthy concern) 2. depression (vs. healthy sadness, sorrow) 3. shame (vs. healthy disappointment) 4. guilt … Read more
Coping with Distasteful Behavior in Others 3/9/2015 Realize that other people really do not make you upset. We make ourselves upset over what others do, fail to do, or how they disappoint us. This is the emotionally liberating message of REBT. Our rigid and extreme beliefs about what people do are really what ‘hurts’ us. […]
1. I make myself upset. Others only give me the opportunity to make myself upset. 2. Rigid beliefs lead to emotional upset. 3. When I am upset I am more likely to say and do things I later regret. 4. I have the capacity to be more flexible by adopting flexible beliefs. 5. A rigid … Read more
15 REBT Based Things to Remember When Having Problems With Your Partner 2/26/2015 1. I make myself upset. Others only give me the opportunity to make myself upset. 2. Rigid beliefs lead to emotional upset. 3. When I am upset I am more likely to say and do things I later regret. 4. I have […]
If you are looking to overcome procrastination keep in mind a few basic ideas. If you must do something perfectly well or demand to even know how to do it perfectly well before you start doing a task you will avoid the task. Often people have beliefs like: 1. It is too hard… 2. It … Read more
