Because of its philosophical roots, REBT is a cognitive-behavioral therapy that has something to offer even during a geopolitical crisis like the one we are currently experiencing. Recent events present the opportunity to feel anger, despair, and anxiety. I will assume you are an individual who adamantly opposes the current aggression in Ukraine. I will attempt to show you how REBT can assist you in this time of great uncertainty and injustice.
Healthy and Unhealthy Negative Emotions
REBT’s distinction between healthy and unhealthy negative emotions is where you preferably should begin. The healthy negative emotions that can help you cope with the needless suffering of millions of Ukrainians are deep concern, great sadness, and strong, healthy anger. It is hard to watch innocent children carrying their teddy bears walking with their mothers towards a border where they can take refuge from this unjust war. This war is a great burden for these innocent children. As a witness to their suffering, you might choose to feel strong, healthy anger as well as deep sadness. These healthy emotions would be better than rage and depression. Your healthy negative emotions would be linked to attitudes like these:
1. I wish humans did not unjustly start wars where innocent children suffer, but sadly they do. Unfortunately, the laws of nature permit fallible humans to persecute and kill other human beings. It is essential that all countries of good conscience immediately band together to stop this tragedy before more people suffer and die. I will contribute in ways that I can and strive to avoid experiencing unhealthy anger, which does no good as events unfold. This challenge is great, but humanity will win out in the end.
2. It is so sad that humans needlessly kill other humans, but unfortunately, this occurs. Life is sometimes so tragic, painful, unfair, and exceptionally difficult. It might be hard to accept this aspect of life, but I can philosophically cope with it and then do what I can about this tragedy and its victims. Is there something I can do to help? If there is, I will do it. Otherwise, I will do better if I feel healthily sad and have a profound concern for what is currently going on.
Coping with the Threat of Nuclear War
There has been mention of the use of nuclear weapons. Many people who hear this might experience extreme anxiety and let their imagination run wild due to their severe anxiety. Due to their fear, they may overestimate the possibility of a nuclear war. Here the healthy emotion is a profound but functional concern. Functional deep concern will help you keep your imagination in check without denying all possibilities. However, with this deep concern, you will not be pessimistic and overestimate the probability of a nuclear event. The attitudes which underpin such functional and appropriate strong concern are:
1. It is tough to listen to Vladimir Putin threaten the use of nuclear weapons, but it is not unbearable. I can bear to listen to his threats and take them seriously enough to think of this possibility, but I will acknowledge I can tolerate hearing such threats even though no one wants to listen to this sort of thing. It is worth enduring this deeply concerning rhetoric of this disturbed man, and hopefully, humanity will never witness the follow-through of such a threat. Having a deep concern will allow me room for hope that humanity will prevail in the end.
2. I wish I had a guarantee that this disturbed man would not do such a thing, but I acknowledge I cannot have one. It is challenging to admit there is always some possibility of him following through on his threat, but this acknowledgment is not unbearable. I can bear this acknowledgment and will choose not to ruminate about it. I can tolerate the uncertainty and focus on doing what I can do and accepting what is beyond my control. This stance is worth adopting as there is little I can do to stop him, and therefore I am willing to live well despite this concerning possibility. My deep concern will allow me to hope that someone or some group will deter him in the end.
Condemn Putin’s Actions, Keep Focused, and Resist
Now brace yourself for perhaps the most challenging implementation of this liberating philosophy. The philosophy of REBT encourages you to do all you can to stop Vladimir Putin but not condemn him. There are multiple reasons to proceed in this clear-minded way. His actions are egregiously wrong. We will have greater clarity if we focus on what he is doing, what he can do, and what he may do but not on his essence. You may think this is a useless distinction, but it is not. His threats are cause for great concern, and the danger of his aims is the unique display of his fallibility. All humans are fallible, and we display that fallibility in unique ways. His striving for greater power, egregious inhumane conduct, and self-righteous arguments are evidence of his human fallibility. His actions have been brutal, and we cannot waste resources on unhealthy anger or fear. Those unhealthy emotions will blind us as we collectively search for the best course of action to defeat him. No good comes from thinking in a way that creates a mythical demonic abstraction such as “he is an evil demon.” This type of thinking is self-defeating in that it sets the stage for unhealthy rage and rumination. The ancient philosopher Lao Tzu taught that “The best fighter is never angry.” Instead of wasting your energy on blinding unhealthy anger, appreciate Putin is a human with very dangerous intentions but a fallible human. Then strive to focus like a laser on his behavior, his twisted logic, and future moves. Now is not a time to be undermined by anger and rage. Too many lives weigh in the balance. We need to focus on his behavior and find his weakness as he is a human, and all fallible humans have vulnerabilities. Those weaknesses will be easier to find with a highly focused mind motivated by a healthy grave concern for his future moves.
This Won’t Be Easy But It is Necessary to Survive
REBT is not an easy philosophy to implement. I readily admit this. However, life is not easy. The REBT philosophical medicine must match the challenge to be helpful. REBT has what it takes to cope with these exceptionally challenging, sad, and uncertain times.
Sadly, innocent people have been killed during this unnecessary and unjust war. It will be a great challenge to not yield to despair for those who have lost loved ones and have seen their homeland destroyed by this aggression. It will be an equally great challenge not to make the missteps stemming from unhealthy anger or give up due to despair. Attitudes that can help you not yield to despair could be:
I have lost a great deal due to the ruthless actions of this dictatorial leader. I wish he had never been born. Nevertheless, he has been, and I have suffered a tremendous loss. Despair will not undo these losses. I will strive to grieve these losses and not further hurt myself with unhealthy despair, even though it is difficult not to yield to despair. I will accept that I have lost a loved one, a friend, or property. However, I will pay an even greater price if I do not work on unconditional acceptance and the strength that comes from it. This position of acceptance might not be one I can quickly achieve, but it is the path, the direction that will help me find the strength to get through this immeasurable loss. Choosing to accept what I cannot change is something Vladimir Putin cannot take from me. Only I can relinquish to him the leverage I can gain through acceptance. I will only assist him in defeating and conquering me if I fail to find a philosophical solution to my loss.
Conclusions
Whether we speak of suffering children, nuclear war, or the death of loved ones, I do not intend to make light of these things by encouraging you to think as REBT philosophy suggests. It is hard to adopt the attitudes I have outlined above. I mean no disrespect to anyone who has suffered mightily since this war began. I acknowledge it is easy for me to write these words. I am not in the trenches with those directly suffering from this war or fighting it. Despite this acknowledgment, I believe in the power of healthy negative emotions and how REBT can be applied to cultivate strength and poise in this challenging time. I want to emphasize how difficult it is to think, as I have suggested above. However, despite my philosophy being difficult to implement, I believe you will find it is harder to yield your emotions to the enemy. We can choose to panic ourselves, lose hope, and surrender to despair. We need to heed the wise words of Lao Tzu that “The best fighter is never angry.” I genuinely believe the angry and fearful man will defeat himself in battle as well as in life. We have seen enough. In my view it is time to take a calculated risk, call his bluff and do what is necessary. All of us are better off giving Vladimir Putin our best effort predicated on strong, healthy negative emotions to put him where he belongs, in prison.