I encourage you to accept that force and energy are required for emotional behavioral change. The human condition is such that we resist changing. If we are to overcome self-defeating behaviors, emotions, and attitudes we have to accept that it will require effort, lots of it!Yes REBT is unique in how we do not sugarcoat the process of therapeutic change. If you are looking to achieve real therapeutic change, either through your own effort or with my help, you will need to ACCEPT that it will involve blood, sweat, and tears so to speak. It will require pushing yourself to go against your natural inclinations. It will require tolerating the discomfort that is a sign you are doing something right in your change effort. If it is comfortable as you “try to change” it is likely you are deceiving yourself. Change is hard. Either you accept this and have a healthy attitude of acceptance or you look for magic solutions, easy ways, and techniques to change, and other sorts of illusionary cures. I am sorry to bring this so honestly to your attention but it is the truth as I see it. You can change but it requires work and effort. Once you have achieved change it requires work and effort to maintain it. If any psychotherapist tells you differently my advice is that you run. Run fast and run far before you waste your time and money seeking comfortable change. You can change but you need to be realistic and accept that you will be going against the grain. The good news is that once you accept this view and start pushing it gets easier to push yourself. We are creatures of habit. Once we stop avoiding and start pushing and leaning into the discomfort of change we strengthen our capacity to tolerate the discomfort of change and the process accelerates and gets a bit easier. So let’s get cracking and start pushing ourselves today! Tell yourself: “This change requires EFFORT but this effort is Not UNBEARABLE. The change is worth it and I am worth doing this for.”