Ideas To Help You Function Well
REBT Ideas To Help You Function Effectively
- Rating Your Behavior & Always Having Self-Acceptance: It is best to rate what I do in order to learn to improve my performance. I will always accept myself whether I do well or poorly.
- Emotional Responsibility: People give me opportunities to get upset but I make myself upset over what they do or fail to do.
- Uncertainty Tolerance: I dislike uncertainty but there are very few guarantees in life. Too bad! I can tolerate making decisions and taking action despite some degree of uncertainty.
- Pain vs. Suffering: Pain is inevitable in life but suffering is optional.
- Realism & Tolerance: People and events will not always be the way I want them to be. People mostly do what they want. Life will often be difficult. Too Bad!
Ideas REBT Encourages You to Relinquish
- Musturbation: I must not make errors or have flaws – if I do, it’s terrible and unbearable!
- Low Frustration & Low Discomfort Tolerance: People and events absolutely should be the way I want them to be; life must be easy and fair for a doll like me!
- Deservingness: I deserve to be treated nicely, fairly, respectfully and when this does not occur I have no choice but to whine, pout and sulk.
- Self-Esteem: My worth as a person can be measured and it is determined by my deeds, traits, accomplishments, physique, assets, possessions, and those of my children.
- Approval Addiction: I must be loved, approved, and respected by practically every significant person in my life – if I’m not, it’s awful and unbearable.
References:
Ellis, A. (1985). Overcoming Resistance: Rational-Emotive Therapy with Difficult Clients. New York: Springer.
Ellis, A. (1962) Pocket Cards published by Albert Ellis Institute.
Jarrett, T. (2005). Warrior Resilience & Thriving. Slide set.