As a former athlete, I wish I had known about REBT when competing in high school and college varsity sports. Had I been skilled in the use of REBT, I would have suffered less emotional pain, performed at an even higher level, and experienced greater enjoyment during the many hours I spent in athletic training and competitions in various sports.
Anecdotal support for my hypothesis was spontaneously brought to my attention by a former patient who reported that his golf game improved after his involvement in REBT therapy for anger management. Unhealthy emotions will undermine concentration and motor performance, reducing athletic performance. REBT will help an athlete beyond enhancing performance on game day. I will discuss how REBT can benefit an athlete with a strong desire to win by facilitating healthy negative emotional responses to various adversities highly competitive athletes encounter.
Maintaining Control over One’s Emotions During an Athletic Contest
An empirical finding known as the Yerkes-Dodson law suggests an optimal relationship between emotional arousal and performance. The relationship is that too much emotional arousal or too little will be associated with less than optimal performance. This finding is consistent with REBT’s theory of emotion. In REBT, we teach that healthy negative emotions like concern about the outcome of our performance are more likely to facilitate optimal performance consistent with our level of preparation and acquired skill than anxiety and fear. REBT aims to help athletes feel a healthy emotion, such as concern, when executing a move in sports so that they can focus their concentration and not be distracted by thinking unrelated to accomplishing the task. For those interested in the mindfulness movement in psychology, it also encourages training in attentional control with nonreactivity. In REBT, we argue that a healthy level of reactivity is associated with optimal performance. We in REBT agree with the mindfulness movement that anxious reactivity will impair motor performance and concentration, as well as shame or depression that lingers on after an athlete has executed a play poorly. When the game continues, the athlete needs to learn to move on to the next play to prevail. The athlete needs to focus his efforts and attention on the present play, not the last play in which he performed poorly. Therefore, the REBT coach wants athletes to feel concerned before and during the execution of movements in a game and disappointment and annoyance after the poor execution of movements, which will allow the athlete to note their performance error, quickly learn from it, make adjustments during the game, and move into the next play with high levels of concentration and motivation.
When an athlete makes a poor play, some will be inclined to upset themselves and dwell on that poor play by demanding that they not have errored and awfulizing about it. Doing so will distract them while in the competition and increase the probability of making another poor play. REBT theory points out that the athlete will often involve their ego and hold the attitude, “I absolutely should not have made that error. I absolutely should not have let my teammates, coaches, and fans down. I looked so bad. I am a loser.” In REBT, we teach athletes to rate their performances but not define themselves as people based on how well they performed or if they prevailed in the game. Athletes have a role to play but easily equate their value as humans with how well they play it. Doing so will undermine their performance and put them on an emotional roller coaster, undermining their performance and degrading their enjoyment of their sport. They will have ego anxiety before the game as they “Must perform well” and ego-based shame and depression after they have performed poorly by concluding, “I lost. I am a loser.” REBT teaches athletes to keep an eye on their performance and discipline their minds so that they do not define themselves as people based on how well they perform or whether they and their team win. Like many other skills in athletic endeavors, this discipline of only rating their performance but not defining themselves based on their performance is challenging. However, athletes can learn through REBT coaching to take their ego out of their performances and have healthy negative emotions before, during, and after their athletic performances.
Coping with Taunting by Other Players and Bad Calls by Referees
To perform optimally, athletes must maintain emotional composure in the face of two other gameday adversities: when opposing players attempt to taunt them, and referees make judgments against a player and their team. REBT encourages athletes to buy into the Principle of Emotional Responsibility fully. This principle argues that opponents taunt them and bad calls by referees are invitations to unhealthy anger, but the athlete does not have to accept these invitations. Players anger themselves by demanding that other players not say or use such tactics and thereby experience insult. Players will also anger themselves by demanding that the referee never make errors when judging a rule infraction during a play. Players taunt each other to diminish their opponent’s performance, giving the player who taunts an advantage. The player who holds flexible and non-extreme attitudes like those taught in REBT that lead to healthy emotional reactivity in the face of these adversities is likely to continue to perform at an optimal level in the face of such taunting. REBT teaches emotional responsibility, and the player who masters this powerful concept will paradoxically frustrate their opponent with their sportsmen-like poise. As for referees and their bad calls, when an athlete accepts the referee as a fallible human who made an erroneous call rather than “an blind idiot” who made a bad call, they are more likely to not penalize themselves with the emotional upset of unhealthy anger when they or their team are the recipients of an inaccurate judgment by a referee. Psychological poise contributes to winning games, and REBT can help athletes cultivate poise to prevail in difficult, emotionally charged moments of an athletic contest.
Coping with a Poor Athletic Performance or Losing
Highly competitive athletes often experience unhealthy negative emotions following a poor performance or losing an important game. The emotional disturbance caused by performing below expectations or losing an important game can wreak havoc on their lives in different ways. Depression and unhealthy anger can impact the quality of their family life, lead to misuse of alcohol or other substances to cope with their disturbance or lead to a negative carry-over effect when they show up for practice the following week. Due to rigid and extreme attitudes, athletes may lose confidence. When athletes depress themselves, they may not practice as hard after a heartwrenching defeat or punish themselves for losing or performing poorly through excessive practice. REBT teaches athletes to philosophically accept losing, which means acknowledging the defeat but having a healthy sorrow, disappointment, or concern about it. For athletes to experience this healthy emotional reaction, they must avoid defining themselves as losers for losing or performing poorly. Ego disturbance undermines a healthy response to losing. Athletes often tie their identity and human value to their roles and performance as athletes. They take the game too seriously in this way. Doing so is self-defeating and often backfires.
Athletes are usually reluctant to accept themselves unconditionally and to accept losing for fear that these psychological changes will make them less motivated to practice hard to prevail in the future. REBT’s unconditional self-acceptance and acceptance of a loss do not undermine their desire to succeed in the future. Acceptance of self and a loss will speed emotional recovery and assist the athlete to train appropriately hard soon after a loss to avoid contributing to a poor showing in the next game they are scheduled to play. REBT targets the absolutistic ideas that undermine acceptance of the self and loss and advocates for unconditional self-acceptance and life acceptance. Unfortunately, losing is part of the game. A healthy emotional response to losing is essential to long-term success as a competitive athlete.
Instead of thinking, “We never should have lost that game to that inferior team,” the athlete is shown that all the conditions were ideal for the game’s outcome to go as it did. The athlete is never encouraged to like losing, but when it occurs, REBT teaches that it has to happen and never defines the athlete as a loser. REBT coaching teaches athletes to stick to the facts by thinking, “I wish we had not lost, but sadly, we did. All the conditions were in place for our team to lose even though this was unexpected and very much dispreferred. Too bad. Now, what can we learn from the game we did lose? Accepting myself unconditionally, even though I will never like losing, will help me practice enthusiastically in the week ahead, setting the stage for a better performance in the upcoming game. I never have to hang my head in shame for having lost, even though losing is very disappointing. Too bad. I am going to win some and lose some, and if I am going to perform optimally in the future, I need to learn to accommodate losing to set the stage for future victories.”
Coping with Injury and Rehabilitation
Next to losing or performing poorly, dealing with an injury and the subsequent rehabilitation period can be very emotionally challenging for the competitive athlete. Athletes sometimes emotionally disturb themselves sitting on the sidelines watching their teams play games when they are injured and unable to participate. Athletes will depress themselves by thinking, “I (absolutely) should be out on the field with my teammates. I cannot bear to watch from the sidelines. Poor me!” An athlete’s insufficient tolerance for the rehabilitation period can inadvertently extend its length when the emotional disturbance the athlete experiences leads them to rush their recovery. Rushing recovery because the athlete cannot bear to be out of the lineup will lead to reinjury that will only extend the period when they return to the lineup at full strength. Again, REBT coaching would target the athlete’s self-defeating attitude that they cannot bear to be out of the lineup. REBT shows the athlete empathy and acknowledges that it is hard to sit games out due to injury, but it is not unbearable. Furthermore, the athlete is encouraged to accept a conservative rehabilitation period because tolerating this period will paradoxically get them back into the lineup in all probability sooner than if they rush their return and cause reinjury.
Athletes may also fear losing their position to a substitute player and rush their return due to unhealthy envy. Here, the athlete may be ego involved and link their sense of worth to remaining a first-string player. REBT coaching would help the athlete acknowledge their concern that they might lose their place in the lineup and not be a first-string player once they recover. The athlete can again be encouraged to tolerate this possibility by applying the foundational idea of unconditional self-acceptance. Ego involvement in athletes can manifest itself in so many different ways and leads to unhealthy anxiety and envy in the case where an athlete may lose their position to another team member during a period of rehabilitation. Ego involvement adds to an injured athlete’s burden and adds to their physical injury the added burden of self-created emotional injury.
Coping with A Career-Ending Injury
The greatest challenge for an athlete involves coming to terms with a career-ending injury that requires retirement from the sport. REBT coaching will encourage the athlete to philosophically accept this significant loss and find a new vitally absorbing interest to replace their participation as an active competitor in the sport. In this circumstance, the REBT concepts of unconditional self-acceptance, unconditional life acceptance, and finding new vitally absorbing pursuits apply. REBT shows athletes that they are unratable, fallible humans first and play the role of an athlete second, and they need to keep this in mind to transition in a healthy emotional way to being an ex-athlete. Giving up the demand to be an active participant in a sport will enable the athlete to consider other roles like coaching, scouting, or becoming part of the administrative management of a team. No reasonably successful, highly competitive athlete wants to stop playing their sport, but in the end, their career is for a temporary period, whether they like it or not. Like life itself, a career as an athlete does not last forever. The sooner they accept the aging process that leads to injury proneness and ultimately to retirement, the sooner they will be able to see how best to involve themselves in life in the future.
Disciplining Oneself to Train Optimally
Like most skills, there is a relationship between the time one spends practicing, the quality of that practice, and the development of expertise. REBT can help an athlete improve their discomfort tolerance for training. Raw talent is not the only ingredient in being a successful athlete. Effort at cultivating whatever talent nature has bestowed on them is a significant ingredient in success. REBT helps athletes cultivate tolerance by targeting attitudes of unbearability that undermine rigorous, regular practice. REBT also targets self-defeating attitudes leading to overtraining and putting oneself at risk of injury. Games are won on game day and during the days and weeks well before game day when an athlete rehearses repeatedly for hours and hours. Effective practice is not only long in duration but high in quality while not overdoing a good thing, also known as overtraining. Athletes, as fallible humans, will find certain kinds of practice easier physically or psychologically and sometimes practice what they are good at, what comes relatively easy for them instead of what they are not good at or what does not come easy. REBT encourages athletes to leave their comfort zone and do what is uncomfortable but bearable, even when that kind of practice is not what the athlete enjoys. Practicing a skill area in which an athlete is weak will produce the greatest return on investment and lead to maximal growth as an athlete. However, athletes also need to know when to rest. For some athletes, rest can be unbearable and, if not done, will paradoxically lead to underperformance or, worse yet, injury. REBT helps athletes accept the role rest plays in generating optimal performance on game day.
Conclusion
REBT is a powerful system of ideas and strategies for regulating emotions and behavioral reactions to achieve worthwhile goals leading to survival, meaning, and personal happiness. REBT broadly applies to the human struggle for excellence and mastery in any endeavor. REBT readily applies to the adversities encountered by both amateur and professional athletes. Unhealthy emotions undermine an athlete’s ability to respond effectively to setbacks. Athletes can use REBT to help them accept that they are fallible humans, manage self-defeating emotions on and off the field, cultivate their innate talent as athletes, and enjoy participation in their sport while avoiding or at least minimizing the degree of emotional suffering in their journey toward victory.