Walter J. Matweychuk, Ph.D. Who makes the primary contribution to what other people feel when you assert your wishes? Consider your position on this everyday interpersonal matter. It is not uncommon to hear a patient tell me they are reluctant to express themselves to another person because they do not want to hurt their feelings. When holding this position, … Read more
In this video, I discuss how to identify your self-defeating attitudes which underpin your unhealthy emotional and behavioral reactions to adversity. I discuss how to challenge these attitudes once you have identified them. I cover the creation of a healthy alternative attitude. I close with a discussion of how best to think about and challenge … Read more
We all have, or preferably should have, a vitally absorbing long-term, creative interest. REBT philosophy teaches that vitally absorbing interests make our lives maximally pleasurable and meaningful. Such immersive interests also probably help us maintain our emotional health as well. It is usually the case that our most personally meaningful goals and plans require sustained … Read more
It is not uncommon to encounter people who are emotionally disturbed about a parent, child, or spouse’s suffering. We love our family and often experience disturbance because we hold unrealistic attitudes towards their suffering. Usually, the individual who disturbs themselves in this way will experience either other-pity, depression, anxiety, or guilt. Experiencing these feelings may … Read more
It is not uncommon for humans to experience a good deal of emotional disturbance after a romantic relationship ends. Whether we decide to end the relationship or the person we love is choosing to end the relationship, humans often suffer enormously after a romantic relationship runs its course. Friends and family may remind us that … Read more
“The future doesn’t belong to the fainthearted; it belongs to the brave.” – Ronald Reagan Life is full of awkward moments. I am referring to that exact moment when you have the chance to say or do what you want or retreat into your comfort zone. It strikes me as a common problem that many people … Read more
Do you know someone who cannot take well-meaning feedback? Perhaps a family member or a colleague cannot tolerate feedback and defensively rebuts your well-meaning feedback. Have you ever defensively responded to feedback? If you wish to understand better what leads to this self-defeating interpersonal response, then read on. Better still, read on because you want … Read more
The Stoic philosophers often recommended that we prepare in advance for adversity by rehearsing certain coping statements. REBT heavily borrows from Stoicism. Here are a few of REBT’s often repeated coping ideas to have at the ready at the tempting moment. The enticing moment is that moment when you face adversity and may begin to … Read more
It is time to double down on Unconditional Life Acceptance. REBT is a tough-minded philosophy that can help us experience Covid 19 personal growth if we discipline our minds to do so.
In the brief video, I discuss how a rational attitude regarding tolerating discomfort should preferably be linked to a statement that the activity is worth doing. In REBT we do uncomfortable tasks in the short run because they maximize pleasure in the long run in areas of life that are important to us.
