Learning From NOT Fearing Failure

Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy is a philosophy of acceptance. It encourages you to apply flexible and non-extreme thinking to the cultivation of unconditional self, other, and life acceptance. This full acceptance of life and other people have some applicability to virtually all of life’s many problems. From birth to death, loss, failure, and disappointment are part of … Read more

Overcoming The Multiple Layers of Depression – The Common Cold of Mental Illness

Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy is a form of cognitive-behavioral therapy that can be extremely helpful for a person struggling with depression. Depression can be complex and have multiple layers to it. It is a common human experience and has been called the “common cold of mental illness.” I will explore what I call primary depression as … Read more

Rigidity and Hitting Your Head Against Reality

At the core of Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy’s theory of emotional disturbance is the concept of rigidity. Albert Ellis argued that we disturb ourselves when we hold rigid and extreme attitudes towards ourselves, others, and life conditions. From these rigid attitudes come extreme secondary attitudes that add to but do not lie at the core of our … Read more

How to Unupset Yourself and Restore Healthy States of Emotion

In Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), I encourage you to learn to help yourself. To do so, you must reflect upon your emotional and behavioral reactions. I want you to know how to identify and replace your rigid and\or extreme attitudes, leading to your unhealthy, self-defeating emotions and behaviors. Over the years, REBT psychotherapists have … Read more

On Hurting Other People’s Feelings

Who makes the primary contribution to what other people feel when you assert your wishes? Consider your position on this everyday interpersonal matter. It is not uncommon to hear a patient tell me they are reluctant to express themselves to another person because they do not want to hurt their feelings. When holding this position, … Read more

Actively Engage with Your Self-Defeating Thinking to Change It

In this video, I discuss how to identify your self-defeating attitudes which underpin your unhealthy emotional and behavioral reactions to adversity. I discuss how to challenge these attitudes once you have identified them. I cover the creation of a healthy alternative attitude. I close with a discussion of how best to think about and challenge … Read more